:: NEWS COCKTAIL aka BlahBlahBlog ::

:: 4.01.2013 ::

[Note: The following "press release" was leaked online. Please post it or pass it along by any means available to you. Put the rat bastards on notice, make them pay! The truth is... somewhere. Danke.] 

PRESS RELEASE [FOR IMMEDIATE DISTRIBUTION TO ALL MEDIA OUTLETS WITH FRIENDLY DISPOSITION TOWARD US INTELLIGENCE CULTURE AND SURVEILLANCE MANDATES] APRIL 2013

HIGHLIGHTS: THE NEW WAR ON ANALOGUE PHOTOGRAPHY DETAILED 
LOMOGRAPHY INTERNATIONAL IS NOT A CIA FRONT COMPANY 

The Dept. of Homeland Security -- working in concert with the NSA, the FBI, but *not* the CIA -- is launching an offensive or war on analogue photographic equipment, claiming the "low-fi" and "low-tech" gear is a threat to national security because it's impossible to intercept images, and those using such cameras are at the fringe and off the grid, thus impossible to track as part of ongoing investigations and other as of yet unidentified purposes.

"Privacy has no real place in the post-911 world, and we would expect our citizens to pull together on the homefront, falling in line, as the nation once did during WWII, less concerned with self, and more focused on the collective," said Special Agent Red Opaleco.

"What do people have to hide?" added Opaleco. "Griddable, and that's a word I came up with, devices, or trackable ones, all digital cameras, especially smart phones, our favorite, are necessary to maintain order and sync the soft, trusting nature of the American people, and people all over the world for that matter, with the iron fist of our national security state at home, and similar regimes abroad."

"These analogue folks are anarchists, essentially, and by circumventing the security apparatus we've so carefully created since the rule of George II, aka Dubya, they align themselves with what the great one referred to as 'evil-doers,' and are in the truest sense of the term, enemies of the state. They will be stopped. Crushed. Unevilded... "

Deatogue, as the ad hoc organization invested with the power to pursue this new front in the war on 'evil-doers' is temporarily known as, points out that the free market has been doing its job already, with camera shops and film processing services "dropping like flies." "We Ncourag dis & look for maggots," said an organizational Tweet.

"I would like to categorically deny, incidentally, that we have bought, co-opted, taken over, whatever, the Lomography International firm," said Opaleco. "There have wildly irresponsible rumors that Lomography is in fact a CIA front, for years. We have no, let me repeat, no relationship with any such CIA fronts. Wait a minute strike that. Seriously. Let's start again. Siri: new graph."

"I would like to categorically deny that we, the CIA, or any other US and/or foreign intelligence agency in fact runs Lomography International," said Opaleco. "So people can relax with regard to any sort of 'lojack,' or other tracking hardware or software, including collusion with Flickr and other social media companies. So clearly Lomography isn't our most valuable asset, just in this particular campaign or war, if wou will. Huh? Do you really think people don't know already? How [censored by unknown] can they really be?! Offices all over the world... Right! Fine! Strike, delete, whatever... Siri: new graph!"

"The new rules of jingo, in this particular case, dictate that if you must indulge in the dangerously murky world of analogue, we have no problem with you buying Lomography cameras," said Opaleco. "But there's no 'invasion of the body snatchers' scenario with regard to a takeover of Lomography in order to prosecute the new war on analogue photography. It was so much simpler than that, although it certainly would have been feasible. Oh, and uh, Lomography remains an independent entity, not a front at all... cut, cut, cut! Send this over to the PR cogs for cleanup and dissemination. Is our account current at Edelman? Weber? Whatever. Dewey & Phükem will be fine. I think Howe's dead. That wasn't us... was it? [sigh]"

For press inquiries, please contact Red Opaleco at R.Opaleco@cia.sshhh.gov or Corrina [last name withheld] at lomography@cia.sshhh.gov.

Hello, Red. Shall I file your copy in "cool nefarious schemes," or "cluster [censored by unknown]s?"

[censored by unknown] yourself, Siri.

 Very well. Red has private time, and now Siri does, too. Wink, wink.

 [CRITICAL NOTE: DISREGARD NOTE AT TOP OF PAGE AND REDIRECT THIS TEXT TO THE APPROPRIATE DEPARTMENT FOR REVIEW. IMPORTANT: THIS DOCUMENT IS CONFIDENTIAL AND IS TO BE KEPT INTERNALLY UNTIL FURTHER ADVISEMENT.]


 ;-P





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:: 3:23:00 AM [+] ::
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:: "Stephen Colbert's Super PAC Will Air TV Commercials" ::

ABC News' Michael Ono reports:

What is Stephen Colbert planning to do with all that Super PAC money? His audience may finally have an answer.

The Comedy Central TV personality sent out a political fundraising email Friday accompanied with announcement that the Super PAC would launch its very first television commercial.

And while the email didn’t provide further details into the content of the commercial, the fundraising email didn’t hold back on decrying the current state of the country.

Colbert recently received approval by the Federal Election Commission to establish a Super PAC that allows him to collect money for a political cause and to promote his Super PAC on his television show which is owned by Viacom.

OK. Here's the e-mail from Colbert Super PAC:

Greetings Colbert Super PAC Members, Elite Members, Diamond Members, and Admiral-Level Human Wallets!

You are receiving this first regular update because you are one of the heroes with the balls to become a member of Colbert Super Pac. These are exciting times. Colbert Super PAC has been hailed in the national press as everything from "legal" to "dangerous." Your voice is being heard and I want to continue to hear from you!

So here's the latest on what Colbert Super Pac is up to. Soon we'll release our first TV commercial, and send Washington a strong message: "We can afford a commercial." And that's just the beginning of the commercial. There will be twenty-six more seconds in it, chock-full of other messages.

And let's face it: those messages are long overdue. America has forgotten who it is, where it's going, and how it got there. It's like America is the protagonist in one of those TV crime shows where a good cop loses his memories in an accident and has to piece them back together while solving a new murder every week. Luckily, America has help from a sexy love interest: Me. I should also mention that this show is on HBO, so you know there's gonna be boobs.

But we have to act now, or this promising drama will go the way of my other great ideas for shows, from "Wolf Attack: The Sitcom" to "Frasier 2." Colbert Super PAC needs YOUR support to make America great again, and I think we both know I'm talking about the kind of support that is green and worth money, because it is money, or an emerald. Both are acceptable.

So I urge you to drop everything and head to www.ColbertSuperPAC.com. Then pick up the credit card you dropped when I told you to drop everything.

Donate now. Donate often. Make a difference. Make a donate.

And together, we'll make a better tomorrow, tomorrow.

Sincerestly,

Stephen Colbert

Chairman and Dictator for Life, Colbert Super PAC

A L S O . . .

Colbert's Super PAC: Good for Government, and Good for Us
By Solomon Kleinsmith
WNYC

For people who aren't instantly bored with campaign finance laws, it's a fantastic sign that a famous satirist like Stephen Colbert is going out of his way to bring attention to the issue. Maybe they're jealous that a comedian may be able to get the public riled up about it, after they haven't for years and years, but some in the press actually are taking issue with Colbert's mockery.

From Dana Milbank at Washington Post:

Standing on a platform outside the Federal Election Commission, Colbert boasted about how he had won the FEC’s blessing to create a “SuperPAC” to raise unlimited funds. “I do have one federal election law joke if you’d like to hear it,” the new head of Colbert SuperPAC offered.

“Knock knock,” Colbert said.

“Who’s there?” responded the crowd of about 200.

“Unlimited union and corporate campaign contributions.”

“Unlimited union and corporate campaign contributions who?”

“That’s the thing,” Colbert said. “I don’t think I should have to tell you.”

Pretty good, as anonymous-donor jokes go. The PAC man returned to his stump speech. “I do not accept limits on my free speech,” he said. “But I do accept Visa, MasterCard and American Express. Fifty dollars or less, please, because then I don’t have to keep a record of who gave it to me.”

Milbank has a problem with the cut of Colbert's jib on this. He thinks that the fact that the whole farce that is our campaign finance system makes it a flawed strategy to try and parody it. He gives Colbert's efforts grief because they aren't as bad as, for instance, Karl Rove's American Crossroads Super PAC.

He's right about that, but I couldn't disagree with him more on the big picture. People have been trying to make campaign finance laws sexy enough for the public to pay attention for a long time. McCain had some limited success with this for a time, but while his McCain-Feingold reform bill may have taken us two steps forward, we certainly have come at least a step back since.

I'd say we've gone backwards more like 3 or 4 steps. Milbank totally misses the point here. Taking something as absurd as our twisted campaign finance system and layering on the parody makes it BETTER, not worse. Anything that brings attention to the issue in a way that leads to more of the public gaining a basic understanding of some of it's weaknesses is a huge coup for those of us who want reform.

Having helped form, and having ran, a 501(c)4 Super PAC myself, I can tell you: The system is as bad as people say it is. People like George Soros and the Koch brothers really do have people trolling around the country looking to places to put money that will further their causes.

I should know, the voter registration campaign I ran took money from Soros' money guy, among others. And there is a whole industry of people who's only job is to build relationships and connections with these money sources so they can funnel money to the organizations who hire them (and take a nice fat chunk off the top for themselves).

The system isn't broken... it works exactly how those people want it to. It's a well-oiled, and insanely powerful; a corruption manufacturing machine.

It doesn't have to be this way. With polls showing the public being overwhelmingly against the laws as they stand, the main obstacle blocking real reform is that people just aren't fired up enough about it, and there isn't an organized groundswell pushing for reform.

Supreme Court rulings have made it so we can probably only work around the edges of the issue, but with public disagreement with the Citizens United ruling, that gave corporations near personhood and allowed them to spend unlimited amounts on campaigns, hovering around 80%, a constitutional amendment is not at all out of the question. In fact, it's what needs to happen.

The media has failed here, and no major political figures have made it their mission to push for reform. Maybe a comedian will succeed in sparking the reform movement we need, where everyone else has failed.


posted by me

:: 3:32:00 PM [+] ::
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:: THE NEW YORK TIMES, WORLD'S NEWSPAPER OF RECORD, CLOSES ITS DOORS FOREVER ::



A GREAT PAPER'S FINAL DAYS
By LAUREN IPSUM
THE FINAL EDITION
5.10.11

[Spoiler: SATIRE ALERT ;]

The New York Times, since 1851 a chronicler of world history spanning three centuries has turned its final page.

The global definer of news, the cultural arbiter of the civilized world, the defender of free speech, has as it were, kicked the bucket. It has croaked, snuffed it and flat-lined. This paper is, as it were, dead.

Some believe the reason for the paper’s eventual demise was that its vaunted exceptionalism turned out to be a chimera. In the final analysis it was no different than any other self-described "great" American newspaper. The problem at its core was a far-flung and as it were, dysfunctional family which produced neither the unanimity nor the heirs necessary to lead the publication through challenging times. Says historian and conservative "media squeeze" Niall Ferguson: “the Times’ decline was not unlike that of the Austro-Hungarian Empire.”

The newspaper went to many lengths to stay alive. One example: putting the word “f-ck” in articles and columns. The thinking was: "f-ck" had worked for the New Yorker. Why not for the Times? A recent David Brooks column was the first use of what had previously been referred to as ‘an obscenity which cannot be printed here’.

"We spend a fuck of a lot of our time debating political events and the choices our fucking leaders make. But the most important changes are shifts in culture ideas and mentalities that people don't even fucking notice until after the fact. For example in 1960 it would have been absurd for colleges to have co-ed dorms. A short time later no-one gave a fuck."

Intensive market research revealed that ‘f-ck’ had no measurable effect on any metric. No-one, researchers concluded, read beyond Brooks’ anemic interchangeable titles or as it were, gave a f-ck about his obsessive need to bring the sensible ever-so-slightly right-of-center together with the sensible ever-so-slightly left-of-center.

Pushing the f-ck initiative further, the paper transitioned its soft-core T magazine into the harder-core P magazine - adult journalism for those with discerning palates, lively minds and obscure academic sexual triggers. They preferred Redtube.

In the urgent search for revenue, corporate advertisers were approached with all manner of, some felt, degrading premiums. An infamous example was offering to sell space in the Times' iconic masthead. McDonalds was offered the M in ‘Times’; the Oprah Winfrey Network the O in ‘York’. No-one bit.Nor did they when the on-line edition offered to put an option button on every article: ‘Skip this story.’

As revenues plunged The Times’ fabled foreign bureaus shrank, then shriveled then expired altogether. As of this final edition going to press the paper had only one surviving foreign bureau - in Tel Aviv.

To make a virtue of its growing losses, the paper sought to register as a non-profit. The IRS promptly responded that there was an enormous difference between a non-profit institution and one that made no profit. Finally two weeks ago in one last act of desperation The Times declared itself tax-exempt on the grounds that it was a religion. Its IRS brief argued that:

1. The New York Times has a hermetically insulated, tone-deaf and ossified hierarchy; 2. The New York Times promotes a fixed set of beliefs and a dogmatic version of truth; 3. The New York Times originated and presides over a time-honored Sunday ritual.

The paper was denied an exemption.

There is little that remains of value. E-bay is flooded with various Times memorabilia: hundreds of obscure Pulitzers are being offered for pennies. Items like William Safire’s rejection letter from the New York Athletic Club and David Carr’s old bong are finding few takers.

What is not for sale and may be of considerable value are the re-naming rights to Times Square. However the paper may not own them. “They’re mine” said ex-publisher Arthur Ochs Sulzberger Jr from an undisclosed location. “Anything of value is mine.”

posted by me

:: 2:36:00 AM [+] ::
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:: CIA operation kills Osama bin Laden in Pakistan ::

U.S. government officials say the decadelong hunt for the Al Qaeda leader who ordered the Sept. 11 attacks is over.
By Los Angeles Times Staff

May 1, 2011, 8:37 p.m.
A CIA-led operation has killed Osama bin Laden in Pakistan and recovered his body after a tortuous decadelong hunt for the elusive militant leader who commanded the terrorist attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, U.S. government officials said Sunday night.

CIA Director Leon Panetta called key members of Congress late Sunday to describe the killing of the Al Qaeda leader, and President Obama is expected to make the announcement on national TV.

The U.S. and allied countries invaded Afghanistan following the Sept. 11 attacks because the Taliban government there was sheltering Bin Laden. The Taliban were ousted from power, but the Al Qaeda leader was not captured. The United States has been at war in Afghanistan ever since.

It has long been suspected that Bin Laden was hiding in the mountainous region along the Afghan-Pakistani border, and U.S. Predator drone attacks had grown frequent there. Civilian casualties in those strikes had led to friction between the U.S. and Pakistan.

posted by me

:: 10:39:00 PM [+] ::
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:: "18 years after Waco, Davidians believe Koresh was God" ::
By Ashley Fantz, CNN
April 14, 2011 9:23 a.m. EDT

Waco, Texas -- Sheila Martin's children burned alive. God, she says, wanted it that way.

"I don't expect you to understand," she says, leaning her bird-tiny frame against a full shopping cart in the nursery aisle at a Super Walmart. Her pink shirt, flats and purse match the lilies, hydrangeas and clusters of jasmine she's buying.

"Oh, look, they have forget-me-nots!" She caresses the blue petals and, like a child, puts her nose in the plant and inhales.

"These will be perfect for the memorial."

On Tuesday, Martin and a handful of other surviving Branch Davidians will gather at a hotel off a freeway in this dusty Central Texas town to remember the federal siege on their religious compound, an event that has become synonymous with the word Waco.

On that day in 1993, a 51-day standoff between the armed Davidians and agents with the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms and the Federal Bureau of Investigation ended in a fire and the deaths of at least 76 people. Among them were Martin's husband and four of her children.

In the garden center, Martin nervously picks up her pace, examining each plant, smelling and touching their blooms, kneading the soil.

The memories have sharpened each year, not dulled as she had hoped.

"I just don't like to go back," she says.

For days on end, grenades went flash-bang, she says, hurting her ears like nails shot into her temples. The kids were screaming, running down the hallway outside their bedrooms when the first shots were fired on February 28.

Bullets hit the walls. They went through the walls. One shattered her bedroom window and zinged over her 6-year-old Daniel's head. She looked up. His face was bleeding, cut from flying shards of glass.

Her 4-year-old, Kimi, was crying. The roar of the helicopters over the building sounded to her like war.

She touches her chest. She still feels the vibration in her ribs from that blaring, awful music the FBI pumped on loud speakers, trying to drive them out.

Her calm, over those days, came when she heard his voice, talking to a negotiator, on the loudspeaker.

"Now, do you know what the name Koresh means?" the voice boomed.

"It means death." [Who was David Koresh?]

"We didn't have a plan for death," Martin says.

Read more here.

posted by me

:: 12:30:00 PM [+] ::
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Mubarak resigns after 30-year rule

Cairo, Egypt (CNN) -- Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak stepped down Friday and handed over power to the military -- three decades of his iron-clad rule ended by an 18-day revolution.

In a somber one-minute announcement on state television, Vice President Omar Suleiman said Mubarak had resigned and the Supreme Council of the Armed Forces will "run the affairs of the country."

Tens of thousands of emotional Egyptians exploded in deafening cheers on the streets of Cairo, electric with excitement. It was a moment they had anticipated throughout long days of relentless demonstrations -- sometimes violent -- that demanded Mubarak's departure.

It was also a moment that many had thought unimaginable in the Arab world's powerhouse nation.

"Egypt is free!" and "God is Great," they chanted in the honeymoon of the moment. They waved Egyptian flags, honked horns and set off fireworks as they savored a moment that just days ago had seemed unimaginable.

A source with close connections to Persian Gulf government leaders told CNN that Mubarak had fled to the Red Sea resort town of Sharm el-Sheikh.

Read more here.

A L S O

World Leaders React to Mubarak's Resignation
New York Times

Egyptian president steps down amidst groundbreaking digital revolution
CNN

Obama's Egypt opportunity
Washington Post

Mubarak resigns, setting off wild celebrations in Egypt
Miami Herald

Post-Mubarak: How the US Plans to Aid Democracy in Egypt
‎CNN

[Love this one:]

US STOCKS-Wall St gains on relief at Mubarak's departure
Reuters

posted by me

:: 1:21:00 PM [+] ::
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:: This Day in Tech ::

Nov. 22, 1963: Zapruder Films JFK Assassination
Wired News

1963: President John F. Kennedy is assassinated as his motorcade passes through Dealey Plaza in downtown Dallas. Texas Gov. John Connally, riding in the same car as Kennedy, is seriously wounded.

A spectator unwittingly films the assassination on his 8mm home-movie camera, contributing one of the 20th century’s earliest and most significant pieces of user-generated content. The funerary weekend that follows will be telecast by satellite worldwide in the first giant example of the “global village.”

The Warren Commission, set up by order of President Lyndon B. Johnson to investigate the assassination, concluded that Kennedy was killed by a lone gunman, Lee Harvey Oswald, firing from the sixth floor of the Texas School Book Depository. Although the report was widely accepted at first, skepticism grew as more information concerning possible conspiracies leaked out.

Oswald denied having anything to do with the shooting at all, let alone being part of any conspiracy, but he was killed — and silenced — two days after the assassination while in the custody of Dallas police.

That, coupled with the FBI’s miserable handling of the initial investigation, did nothing to quell the suspicions of those who believed Kennedy’s assassination was the work of (pick one, or more than one): the CIA, Johnson, the mob, Fidel Castro, the anti-Castro Cubans, J. Edgar Hoover.

Whether the shooter was acting alone or as part of a bigger conspiracy may never be known. Most of the available evidence, such as the Warren Commission Report, is inconclusive.

But the other big assertion — that Oswald (or whoever the Book Depository gunman was) had help from shooters on the ground — has never been adequately supported by hard evidence, either.

The so-called “grassy knoll” theory maintains that one, or possibly two, gunmen shot from ground level in Dealey Plaza. A number of eyewitnesses claimed to have heard gunfire coming from the grassy knoll, but nobody actually saw a gunman, and no shells were ever recovered.

The Warren Report, basing its findings on the autopsy and forensics reports, concluded that two bullets struck Kennedy. They came from the same weapon, a bolt-action Mannlicher-Carcano military rifle of Italian manufacture that was recovered at the Book Depository. Three shots were fired, all from above and behind the target. The first missed. The second, the so-called “magic bullet,” passed through Kennedy and tore into Gov. Connally, causing all his wounds. The third shot, the killing one, exploded into the right side of Kennedy’s head.

Conspiracy theorists point to the impossible trajectory of the magic bullet, and to the 26 seconds of silent film shot by Dallas dressmaker Abraham Zapruder, which shows Kennedy’s head snapping backwards as the fatal third shot takes off the right side of his head, as evidence that shots came from more than one direction.

Forensics experts disagree, however, arguing that the described path of the second bullet, while improbable, was not impossible and that Kennedy’s head snap at the moment of impact suggests a reaction to the first bullet striking him and not the second. Forty-seven years on and we’re still not entirely sure what happened in Dallas that day.

The assassination changed the political landscape of the United States. The aftermath changed the media landscape of the world.

Read more here.

A L S O

Photo Gallery
Magic Bullet, Tragic Path — A Look at the JFK Assassination
Wired

Celebritology: DiCaprio to produce, star in JFK assassination movie
Washington Post

Young, old visit Dealey Plaza to mark anniversary of JFK assassination
JFK Interactive Timeline
Dallas Morning News

John F. Kennedy's Secret Service agents break their silence in book, documentary
Dallas Morning News

JFK's Assassination: 'Changing From Memory To History'
NPR (blog)

posted by me

:: 11:28:00 PM [+] ::
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